Do you ever get lonely….? February 17, 2010
article by Becky Phillips/photo by http://www.christianachilders.com
…. I mean heart rending, tear flowing, throat wrenching solitary lonely?
The kind that it doesn’t matter who is in the next room? When it doesn’t matter if someone is hugging you in consolation? I sometimes experience such engulfing, painful loneliness for what seems like no reason at all. Perhaps I’m missing my mom who lives far away, or perhaps I’m feeling distant from my husband.
Maybe I’m aching for my best friend in another state, or thinking of the far future when the kids are out of the house. More often, though, it’s the feeling of being a truly alone being in an internal world of my own. It’s a feeling of never being truly understood because no one can ever be in my skin, thinking my thoughts, feeling my emotions.
But what happens when I finally recognize my state of mind and respond to God’s never-ending presence, his hand reaching out waiting for mine… well, it’s astonishing. That heartache and sorrow begin to be a bit more manageable. When I grab on and hold on I remember that Jesus also experienced horrible loneliness when his disciples fled from him, and especially when he was separated from his Father. He experienced my pain one hundredfold, and he can handle mine too. He will walk with me through it and give me peace in the midst.